4-Year-old Son Constantly Getting Sick

Updated on March 02, 2010
Y.A. asks from San Jose, CA
31 answers

My 4-year-old has been getting sick about every three to four weeks. He gets a fever (I haven't taken his temperature, but he feels pretty warm). He complains of stomachaches, headaches and leg pain (not all at once, but at different times) and he says he's cold even if it's over 90 degrees . He doesn't want to eat and just wants to lie on the couch and watch TV or sleep (he's normally very active and a very good eater). It usually lasts two to three days. It's been going on for about six months and it's really making me worry. It's kept him out of preschool quite a bit and I'm worried he's going to miss a lot when he's in kindergarten, which he will start later this month. A few months ago I mentioned it to his pediatrician at my daughter's check-up and he kind of just brushed it off saying something like, "Yeah, kids get sick." Today I called again and told him it's still happening and that I'm worried. He said, "I'm not. He's growing normally and it doesn't seem like anything's wrong." He thinks I'm being paranoid, but there are a lot of kids in my family and I had never heard of this. He asked me to schedule an appointment for next week, but I don't like the way he's dealing with this and I have a feeling he's not going to do anything. He's been our pediatrician for over 9 years and I really like him. I don't want to change doctors. Has anyone ever heard of anything like this? My motherly instinct is telling me something's not right. Thanks!

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So What Happened?

First, I want to thank everyone who responded. You were all very sweet, helpful and understanding. The doctor ended up being very nice about it and ordered a bunch of tests, including CBC, lyme disease and lead. Fortunately, all the tests came back normal. He said it could just be a virus that he keeps getting. I hope that's the case and that he outgrows it soon. I am taking his temperature now and documenting every time he gets sick. Thanks again to everyone for their concern. This was my first time using this site and it was a very pleasant experience. I plan to use it again the next time I have an issue. Take care!

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E.H.

answers from San Francisco on

There have been a lot of bad colds and flus going around this last year and preschool is a prime time to get them. Have you moved recently? New germs can be a factor. Might you get an blood test too? See if his blood iron is up, white blood cell count normal, etc.

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K.S.

answers from San Francisco on

Hi,

Maybe you should get a second opinion. Perhaps have another doctor look at him. Kids do get sick, but if it seems excessive to you than by all means have another doctor take a look at him. Mother knows best!

Also, I wanted to ask you about the transcriptionist job. Do you find it lucrative? How long did it take you to get trained? Any advice for someone looking to make extra money on the side?

Thank you,
K. Summers
____@____.com

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R.F.

answers from San Francisco on

I am so sorry for all your worry I can say I UNDERSTAND! We have been trying to diagnose my 13 year old with the same symptoms for almost 5 months. He has had blood test and stool test after eachother. They thought it was mono, psychological or flu. Finally we went to an allergists and found in a scratch test he had the most severe allergy she had ever seen to "grass". Yes grass when it is in the air high levels he can not move. It has been long and scary but well worth finding out. So now we are testing more things and getting ready for shots. I hope this helps, and I hope you find the reasoning behind his sickness. Best to you
R.

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M.P.

answers from Modesto on

Hi mama, first of all, big,big hugs to you and your son :( Poor little guy. My heart just breaks for little ones when they're sick. Especially when it's something chronic like what he is going through. Please,please,please take him and demand some tests. You have every right to have them done and I'll bet if your doc understood how concerned you are he would go along with it just fine. As other mamas said there are a million things it could be. Most of them are nothing serious but do need a little help to leave his system. Please keep us updated. I'll be thinking of your little angel and wishing him all the best and a quick return to health :)

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K.J.

answers from San Francisco on

I understand what you are going through. My so just turned 5 and during his 4th year he was sick with a cold or throwing up a lot. He also said his legs hurt and liked it when I rubbed them - I think he was going through some growth pains and I think he also would do it when he needed extra attention.
I always say go with your gut. Looks like you have had lots of experience with kids. When going to the Ped remind him that none of your other kids have gone through this and also request some blood work. Explain to him you want to rule out as much as you can. If you want to get a 2nd opinion you have every right and your current Dr should appreciate you doing so.
Good Luck Let us know what happens.

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R.F.

answers from San Francisco on

My mother's instinct agrees with yours!!!
Get a second and even a third opinion if you have to. While kids do get sick lot, the combination of lethargy, fevers, and leg pains can be suspicious, especially for SIX months!?! Until blood work/some testing shows you everything is okay, I would push for an answer until you are satisfied.
At the very least, your current physician should order a CBC for your son and STAT!

GL

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B.R.

answers from Sacramento on

Your pediatrician may be correct. Things do tend to go around - again and again and again - particularly when a child is in a daycare setting with so many other children sharing their germs. However, as others have said, don't ignore your mother's instinct. Your son's pediatrician should at least be willing to do some tests, if for no other reason than to allay your fears.

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J.K.

answers from Fresno on

am with you on this. He needs to do some tests at least bloodwork to check his blood counts. Take him next week to your reg dr and if he doesn't do anything take him to someone else. Suggest a CBC. If he is in Preschool he may just be getting a new virus over and over but he should still be checked out.

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S.M.

answers from San Francisco on

When you see your doctor next week, remind him that this child is the youngest of your three sons, and the next to youngest of your four kids, and when your motherly intuition tells you that something is wrong, you are not just talking out of your hat, and you want to know what's up. If he doesn't respond, find another pediatrician right away.

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W.M.

answers from Sacramento on

Y.,
the best thing I ever did for myself was to get a second opinion. I was told for 7 years there was nothing wrong with me, and it turned out the doctor was wrong all along. I have an autoimmune disorder that causes a lot of weird symptoms. Before diagnosis I got a new doctor, primary care and rheumatology. One thing you could do it to document when he is sick on your calendar, and what the symptoms are, and take his temperature. Not to scare you, but my kids pediatricain ignored me for a week, then my son became lethargic and non responsive, the doctors office told me to get that baby in here now, I did as follow, and it turned out he had pneumonia (second opinion) with fluid in his lungs. We were taken immediately to the hospital and stayed for three days until he was on the road to recovery. The next day the regular doc came in for rounds and commented to me that "I finally got what I wanted". How assinine was that? From then on he was no longer with that practice, but I have learned that he opened his own. Needless to say our son is now 15 and doing well. Get a second opinion!!! W. M.

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B.S.

answers from Sacramento on

Keep pushing the doctor. Write down the symptoms as they happen and take his temperature. It could be anything from a food reaction to environmental allergic reaction to being really sick. Six months is a long time to be having this reaction with no response from the doctor. If you have insurance go to the after hours clinic for a second opinion. He's your child. Get some answers.

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N.P.

answers from Modesto on

It's true....kids do get sick, and there has been ALOT of different things going around this year or so. Just 2 weeks ago, my 6 yr old began the same symptoms as your son, then suddenly yesterday he felt better. Having him be my youngest, though, I knew to wait a little bit :O)

For my son, I just made sure he's eating regularly (due to summer break), and drinking water. I don't care if he needs to lay on the couch, because everyhbody needs a break, even a 6yr old :O)

I would follow through with the Dr that you "love". You need to get your son seen for "peace of mind" purposes. Maybe by next week your son will be fine. But, I would write down the symptoms and their duration, so you are ready with information to "defend your case".....

I'm sure he is just fine, don't worry too much :o)

~N. :O)

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J.F.

answers from San Francisco on

Hi!

I'm sorry to hear about your situation. I don't have a specific answer for you but one of my Gymboree Moms just told me about an illness or disease that her 4 year old son is being tested for which sounds like your child's symptoms. In his case, he gets high fevers every 4-6 weeks or so. I'm not sure what other symptoms accompany the fever but he's ill with a fever for a few days, it goes away and then he's Ok for another few weeks. I've met this child and he has lots of energy all the other times!

If you'd like me to check in with the Mom, I'd be happy to ask her what the illness or disease is that he's been tested for - good news is that I think it will go away as he gets older.

If you want to send me a message, feel free to do so at ____@____.com, given that you have experience with other children, I'd be really firm with your pediatrician that something doesn't seem right and that you know kids get sick, but this is not the usual pattern for your family. It would also probably be good to know what his temperature really is.

J.

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M.K.

answers from Chico on

A second opinion doesn't mean you have to switch primary docs. :)

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C.M.

answers from San Francisco on

Maybe its food allergies. Does your primary care physician have to refer you to specialists or does your healthcare plan allow you to iniate the appointment? Maybe next time you have sign-ups for health insurance (fall for plans starting in Jan) you can change your plan.

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C.J.

answers from San Francisco on

Y.,
Follow your instincts and get a 2nd opinioin. If nothing is wrong then at least you checked possible options. Have you researched his symptoms at all? Growing pains, and maybe glasses are needed? I hope your baby is ok.

C.,
Helping moms work from home
www.AtHome4MyGirls.com

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J.T.

answers from Sacramento on

This sounds very similar to an illness that my nephew has had for about six months. Every month, almost to the day, he would have a high fever, be very lethargic, sometimes sick to his stomach, sometimes earaches, just a hodge-podge of symptoms for several days to a week. After the fourth month of it my sister insisted that the Dr. take some tests to rule out something serious. After blood work came back clear, she was told it was probably a syndrome called PFAPA (not very well known), which is treated easily with a steroid at the on-set of symptoms and is something he will outgrow. He just started his symptoms this week and they gave him the steroid and then he was fine. He definitely has it, but it is no longer a problem with the medication. Do some research on it yourself before your next visit to the Dr. We really need to be our own health advocates when our gut says something is wrong, but the Dr. can't or won't help. Good luck!
J.

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D.C.

answers from Fresno on

Could it be growing pains? At this age, there can be some growth spurts. My daughter's been going through them for a few months (she turns 5 in a week).

If it's not that, trust your gut! You're the mom ... get a second opinion.

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R.W.

answers from San Francisco on

You should get a second opinion if he blows you off again this week. Because your instincts are telling you something is wrong (with plenty of parenting experience) you should listen to them!
The leg pains may be just growing pains, they may be unrelated (unless it's only one leg). And I wouldn't tell a doctor "he feels warm, but I haven't taken his temperature"---you need to take the temperature, and have actual information for the doctor. Write things down. Get a calendar and write when there is a headache, stomach ache, when he eats/sleeps, any fever (actual degrees). Also write when you first noticed all of this. A doctor can look at this and look for a pattern. If you give him actual data, he can't say it's just your feelings or imagination.
I knew someone whose son (about 4) had some problems for years (like he didn't sleep well, didn't eat much, tired) and she thought he was just sort of naturally "frail" (I think he was a preemie baby, so they thought he was just not very strong). But it turned out there was a problem! Nothing too serious, but he had some kind of surgery and he was much better after that. She realized he had been suffering for years, after they saw the difference in him.
Good Luck.. I hope you solve the mystery. = )

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K.P.

answers from Sacramento on

Y.,

I agree with the other posts that you absolutely must trust your own instinct and get your son tested. You need the CBC to rule out blood disorders such as anemia, Leukemia, Lymphoma, etc. and I agree that ruling out lyme disease and rheumatoid disorders is wise also. All can be done with a simple, quick blood test.

It also quite possible that he is catching the many flu like bugs going around this summer. I have never seen so much sickness in a summer. Every one in my family was sick at least twice and most of our friends have been sick at least twice as well. Growing pains can always be a part of the equation but I believe they generally occur at night as bodies grow while sleeping.

So while I believe it is most likely something small and easy to fix I know that sometimes our children do get more serious illnesses and when that happens we need to act swiftly and calmly. My daughter was diagnosed with Leukemia at the age of 18 months and is off treatment and perfectly healthy now. She was diagnosed because of my mother and I's sleuthing and figuring it out - not the doctors. However, our doctor was wise enough to not question our own diagnosis and got us in for a blood test immediately to confirm it.

I hope to read a wonderful follow-up post from you stating a clean bill of health for your son! You are welcome to contact me privately as well if you want more info on any of this.

Best of luck and I hope he loves Kindergarten this year!

K.

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B.B.

answers from Salt Lake City on

Follow your instincts. Every time I have followed mine, I've been right. If your doctor doesn't listen to you, he isn't the doctor for you. The last time my doctor said my child was fine and told me to take him home, I took him to the ER instead. He ended up needing emergency surgery for a ruptured appendix. Glad I didn't listen to that doctor...

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L.S.

answers from Salinas on

My daughter had something very similar, low grade fever, joint aches and malaise. It turned out that she has Lymes disease, and the pediatrician didn't even want to do a blood test until I insisted. We went the alternative therapy route, and found both a homeopath and an acupuncturist that my daughter and I both liked. Today she is really healthy, but it took persistence for the doctor to notice.

It doesn't sound like Lymes, because of the stomach aches and the muscle pain, but I would be persistant because mother instincts are almost never wrong. Good luck :)

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L.C.

answers from San Francisco on

Hi-Like everyone said, follow your instincts! Ask to have a blood test on your child to rule out anything serious.

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N.A.

answers from San Francisco on

Hi Y.,

It sounds like your baby needs balance. He body needs to rebuild the immune system.

I have learned that symptoms come because the body is not healthy, get the body healthy the symptoms go away.

I can show you how naturally if that interest you.

There will be a panel of medical Doctor's on Sept 12th to educate children's wellness. It is very powerful.

Wish you well.

N. Marie

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C.B.

answers from San Francisco on

Go with your instincts! Call your ped and schedule an appointment for a complete physical, blood work-ups and the whole bit.

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M.L.

answers from Redding on

I would seek a second opinion and if you haven't started documenting his health issues do it now. It will help show your current dr. as well as new drs what exactly is going on and may speed up the process of figuing out what is wrong. Each day write down how your son feels, symptoms, etc. It may not hurt to keep a log of what he eats as well.

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K.S.

answers from Salinas on

From the time my daughter was 2 would get sick, with the fever throwing up and fever (as she got older she would also complain of headaches). We would take her to the doctor; Oh she just has a virus. We would give her Tylenol, but the symptoms would last for 4-7 days, but she wouldn’t be fully recovered until about 2 weeks after she first got sick. The time between these bouts was usually a couple of months at a time. Her 1st grade teacher suggested maybe she was getting migraines (which do run in both mine and my husbands families). After doing much research I came to the conclusion that this was most definitely what it was and made an appointment with her doctor. When she was presented with the information, she agreed with me and even wondered how many other kids come in with these same symptoms and they (the doctors) have no idea that is really the problem because there is no real research on the subject in children.
Long story short - We were referred to Ped. Neurologist who also agree she is having migraines. Now we give her Motrin and have her sleep more in her bed instead of rest on the couch and we have dramatically reduced the duration to 2-3 days and she bounces back much faster. We have had a hard time tracking down what set her off, but more and more I am thinking it is constipation, which she has been battling since she was 2 and still has problems with today, but she is learning that she needs to go if she doesn’t want to get sick.

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D.S.

answers from San Francisco on

Hello Y.: I am concerned about your attachment to the doctor.
I had one pedi. doc.with our youngest (of 5), who kept saying nothing was wrong with my son just my being over protective. Turns out after his being seen by another doctor that he has Aspberger's which is a form of Autism. I had wasted 3 years of my going back often and just couldn't believe it.
That is what 2nd opions are all about. So follow your instincts and ask for a new person to see him and then go back to the 1st if you want to. I hope it turns out to be something simple like fear of starting school or growing pains. Good Luck, Nana G

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M.S.

answers from San Francisco on

Y.,

If your mom instinct is telling you something is wrong, listen to it! I would call the doctor today and insist on a complete blood test to rule out anything. If you aren't satisfied with their helpfulness or feel they aren't taking you seriously, consider going to another doctor. You are your childs best advocate. Don't stop asking questions until you feel you know the root cause of this and how you will treat it. Good luck to you and your family.

Molly

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K.H.

answers from Sacramento on

You don't have to change doctors but if I were you, I would get a second or third opinion. Sounds like something is going on with your son and if your motherly instincts are alarming you, then you should get some additional medical checks.

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R.M.

answers from St. Louis on

Sounds like your son has what my son had!! We lived with this nightmare for 4 years befor something was finally done, and that is only because I just kept on and kept on bugging his pediatricians. My son would get a fever every 3 to 4 weeks, and they would last 3 to 4 days. Sometimes the fevers would get extremely high around 104 - 105, and he would just be lethargic. He ususally bounces off the walls. The fevers would get high enough that they would cause bad headaches or sometimes even make him vomit. The first year he had it we went to the Dr. ever month right on schedule every 3 weeks back at the Dr. Finally they sent us to a specialist at Children's Hospital. They made us come back for about 3 months when they finally said he had periodic fever syndrome. They gave me some steroids to give him for when the fevers came on really high. The steroids make him really irratable, so the fevers were almost even better. He is in first grade now, we dealt with it all the way up until a couple of months ago. By November my son had already missed 20 days due to these fevers. I got on the internet searching for an answer. Marshall's Syndrome, aka periodic fever syndrome is actually a lot more common now than it was when my son was 3 when it started. Children's hospital in Boston did a study where they took 37 kids with Marshall's syndrome and took out their tonsils and adenoids, it cured 36 of those children. I went to my pediatrician and begged them just to try it. My son got his tonsils and adenoids out the day before Christmas, and he has not been sick yet!!! So I would do some research on it, and if this sounds like what your son has, I would seek out the pediatrician that will get this done for you. Hope this helps!!

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