Beyond Frusterated with Bed Wetting

Updated on February 10, 2008
C.C. asks from Yucca Valley, CA
9 answers

My son is 13 years old and still wets the bed. Dr's say it's normal everyone says it's normal but it is so frusterating. He has now been on the bed wetting medication for about 3 months and it is still not working. The Dr's are slowly upping his doses but he still wets the bed. He does not have a bladder control problem during the day. We tried no drinks after 7 and getting him up in the middle of the night to go pee & nothing works. It hurts his self esteem so I am desperate for advice from other mothers that have experienced the same issue.

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C.T.

answers from Los Angeles on

It is very hard. My daughter wet the bed until she was 9. We tried everything, Took her to Three diferent doctors. They all said the same thing, "It's not a problem." When she was 5 she started having night terrors, which are really bad nightmares, we thought that may have been the cause of it. But once she was in therapy for it and they were under control the bed wetting still happened. Finally she saw a Phyc. Doctor. Finally some answers, we were told she has ADHD. That caused her to wet the bed and have night terrors. We got the ADHD under control without meds and now she has not wet the bed or had a night terror for well over a year.

Also something eles we were looking into is a kidney problem. If you call the kideny foundation they can give you lots of information that may help. But they told me that sometimes children's bladders do not develop fully until they are older.

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P.B.

answers from San Diego on

I have been in your shoes, my son is 11. We now limit his drinking to one glass at dinner, nothing after 6. NO power drinks especially gatorade. no sugar.... that seems to help. but I feel for you. I'll pray for both of us tonite and other nights especially when he's upset too.. P

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M.C.

answers from Los Angeles on

I know that this is frustrating for all involved. Before I was married, I was a nanny. One of "my kids" was a bedwetter only at night as well. She wore pullups until she was about 12 or so. The doctor said that she just slept so deeply that she couldn't feel that tickle signaling urination. She eventually grew out of it.

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D.M.

answers from Los Angeles on

There is a foundation that can help you with your son's enuresis (night bed wetting). You can also do an online search with phrases such as, "help with bed wetting" or "enuresis." Get all the information you can so you can make an intelligent decision for your son.

I have four children - all but one wet the bed until they were around 8 or 9 years old. I wet the bed until I was nine. When my youngest daughter was eight, I finally contacted the Enuresis Foundation for help, and they were very helpful.

Best wishes to you,
D. M.

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N.H.

answers from Honolulu on

Hi, I will say some prayers. I also wanted to share a product I found while looking for a potty watch for my son. Try www.pottytrainingsolutions.com as they have several different bed-wetting alarms. My best friend used something similar when her then-8-year-old was still having problems. It woke him up at the first sign of wetness and helped him get to the bathroom.

Good luck and God bless!

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H.S.

answers from Los Angeles on

Please don't believe he has ADHD...and don't give him diapers. Sorry moms :)

I have five kids and two of them wetted late. One stopped at 8 and the other just before he turned twelve.

Ultimately the solution became the same as when I toilet trained them a tthe age two.

They have to clean the mess up themselves, ie change the sheet in the middle of the night and launder it the next morning.

The diaper only gives them a green light to pee even if asleep.

Turn a low light on , keep the room warm, keep a potty or a large mouthed bottle near by so he does not have to over come the "long trip" to the bathroom.

Keep him from watching scary TV/film/games..so they don't repeat in his dreams.

Get him up to pee before you go to sleep every night, even if you have found it does not stop the wetting, it will help him.

Give him a dollar for every night he does not pee...give it a few months and gone baby gone.

Teach him how to change the babys diaper, and have him do it every day...

The key is to make him as much aware and CAUSATIVE over the area as possible without blaming him.

Dont get frustrated it is just pee...by the way very good against acne the experts say :)

Love H.

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G.H.

answers from Los Angeles on

C., I am there with you! My 10 1/2 year old daughter uses pull-ups every night. And our pediatrician also feels it's not a problem. I try to make sure I don't send Katie any signals that I think it's a problem. It's hard enough for her. We tried waking her up, and we tried homeopathic bedwetting tablets. It appears we just have to wait. She hides it now when she has sleepovers and works it out herself. It bothers her which I thought would motivate her but it doesn't seem that's the problem. She is an extremely heavy sleeper (like her Mom who also remembers wetting the bed at 9 years old). The best memory I have is that my mother was so great about it. She just got up with me, changed the sheets, and we went back to bed. No shame and I didn't have to deal with her feelings messing up understanding my own feelings. Next I'm looking in to the bed alarm to see if that helps because I know she wants to get out of pull-ups (she wets every night). I'll research it with her to get her invested in it (and to see if she is ready and willing before I spend the money). G. H

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J.M.

answers from San Luis Obispo on

My nine year old still wets the bed. I did too...until, I had my adnoids out. You should take your son for a sleep study. He may snore and have sleep apnea...which means he stops breathing for a few seconds. This messes with his nuerological stuff. So, his mind never tells his body he has to go. You should read up on it. I bet he has apnea. I feel your frustration. My pediatrician doesn't believe in surgery, but if we still have this problem in a couple of years we will do a sleep study and get a 2nd opinion. He has already been diagnosed with sleep apnea.

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S.B.

answers from Los Angeles on

You both must be so frustrated and he must be embarrassed. Maybe you could enroll him in the idea of using an adult diaper while you are tring to regulate his medicine, that way if he has an accident he can take care of himself in private without you and the bed is still clean. Alarms are great if they can wake him before he is wet, but if you are already doing everything you can to limit fluids his body just needs time isn't is just a horrible waiting game? It must be very hard for a 13 year old boy.

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