Entertaining My 4 Month Old

I can't remember "entertaining" my daughter a lot when she was that age, besides of what you have already described.
I did have a "baby gym" that she could lie under and entertain herself a bit and only a few infant toys for tummy time (which she also hated, so I did not force it, since I carried her A LOT). Her being my first I felt a bit guilty at times for just "plopping" her under the baby gym and letting her play for a while, but both my mom and my pediatrician pointed out how important it was to give them a little bit of time to play and explore by themselves, even at that age - plus she seemed really content and happy.

If she wasn't happy or had enough, I just wore her in a carrier and went about my normal routine, all the while singing to her or explaining what I was doing (laundry, dish washing, cooking, cleaning...).

She is a toddler now, still loves books and singing and actually plays by herself pretty well at times.

Good growing....!

I have a book recommendation for you that my sister gave me when my first, now 12, was born. It's called "Baby Games", by Elaine Martin, and has a variety of things to keep you busy with baby up to 3 years old. I think there are lots of other books, too. It always helped me when boredom struck; we were tv free, too.
It just takes a little creativity, but it can be hard at this age, since they're not mobile! Good luck!

This is probably going against the grain of what others are suggesting, but I'll give it a shot! At four months, you should not be getting into the habit of entertaining your child all day long. Heck, at that age, watching the wind in the trees is entertainment. Do what you like to do (as another poster suggested) walks, library, go for coffee. If you are already talking to her, do what you are doing and keep her in the conversation. This includes fixing dinner, laundry, weeding, horses, reading (what you like to read, out loud). Remember, everything is new to her!

I have two boys that can play by themselves for nice parts of the morning or afternoon. One played by himself long before his brother came along. Good luck, this is a great time of adjustment, for everyone!

At this age, your baby does not at all need to be entertained. Your baby will not be bored unless left alone on a blanket/in a crib all day long. Babywear so that your baby is up close to you and you can talk to them about what you're doing/thinking. At 4 mo, it is YOU who needs to be entertained as life with a young babe isn't stimulating enough for most adults. Get out of the house, see friends, try going to a movie, go for a walk, etc. Your baby is about as portable as they're ever going to be so enjoy the ability now to do what you enjoy and bring baby along, sharing the world with them.

The days feel much longer when you are home alone all the time and feeling like you need to entertain baby. I used to feel some guilt when I would do anything other than staring at/talking to my baby. Soon, you're little one will be so interactive that things will get much easier. Until then, take care of your needs for interest/socialization.

I remember afternoons with my first baby -- they were deadly! My advice is to get out of the house when the afternoon doldrums hit. Go to parks, libraries, grocery stores, malls, restaurants, get together with friends, etc. Or even better yet, introduce your daughter to horses -- kids and animals are a great combination. Going out is the best way to entertain a baby because there is so much going on and they learn about the real world. It also allows you to just "be" with your baby without having to overfocus on her (I believe most firstborns are slightly neurotic because of the amount of focus and attention given by the enthusiastic parents.) Forget about the housework -- you will be far more effective in the evening if you have given yourself a break during the day.

Where I live we also have an indoor playground co-op called "Tiny Tots" where you can meet other moms and let the kids play (or hang out on the tummy mat, whatever). I can't think of a better resource than Tiny Tots because it is open Monday through Saturday 9-4:30pm. You have to do some openings and closings and a couple of toy cleanings, but for $90 a year, what a bargain! It saved my life. I'm sure there are also a lot of other great mommy groups too, if your area doesn't have one of these. Meeting other moms is probably the best thing to do with your time if you are a first time stay home mom.

Finally, babies that age do well with a couple naps a day (10 and 2 are good times). You could try rocking her to sleep and giving yourself some "you" time. Or if she doesn't sleep, give her a toy and hang out on the mat with her reading a book or folding laundry or something so you're with her but not necessarily stimulating her. I used to babywear my first one constantly and got burned out. I also realized later that he could have benefited from the down time and more naps, as babies do get overstimulated. Sometimes their activity level actually increases because they are tired and just need to be soothed or rocked to sleep (they are often literally unable to put themselves to sleep.) Turn on a fan in the room and they are likely to sleep even longer. Congrats on your new baby, and try to take it as easy as you can -- remember, raising a child is a marathon and not a sprint. ;-)

I agree with some of the other posts. Your 4 months old does not need "entertaining", the world alone is new and interesting. Simply wear your baby so that she can see what you're doing and talk to her a lot. Babies really aren't absorbing books, tv or games at 4 months old. What they really need is to observe the world and get lots of love and kisses. Save the "entertaining" time for when she's older and actually needs to be read to, etc. Never in our evolutionary past would a mother have sat around and entertained her baby. She would have lived her life and let her new one learn the daily processes through her experiences.

For now, get out of the house, visit friends, go to the park, whatever!

Hi Lucy,

I do agree with other posters that giving your daughter opportunities to entertain herself is important, even at her age. That said, I remember growing bored with the activities I did with my daughter when she was that little. Here are a couple of suggestions:

1. Sing with your baby. Prop her up on your knees, hold her hands and sing kid songs you remember. Make her hands go through the motions. Our favorites were "The Itsy Bitsy Spider," "The Wheels on the Bus," "Head, Shoulders, Knees and Toes" and "If You're Happy and You Know It." My daughter LOVED this and sings those songs now at 19 months.

2. Check out your local library. Ours has a story time geared especially for infants and toddlers that has a lot of nursery rhyme activities.

3. You mentioned books--look for ones that have pictures of baby faces. Or make a photo album of family faces, especially Daddy, since he's deployed.

4. Check out "your first class is free" activities. Gymboree, Kindermusic and other places like that offer free classes for moms and babies to try. Even if you don't want to spend the money to enroll in a class, you can pick up some great tips.

5. Find a mommy-baby exercise class. It'll be good for you and give her a change of scenery. I go to Baby Bootcamp.

6. Peek-a-boo with toys or yourselves.

7. See if any of your local churches have a MOPS group. They usually don't meet during the summer months, so you'd probably have to wait until September. It's a twice monthly mommy group where the kiddos go to child care (lets them be around other babies and adults, which is GOOD), and the mommies meet in another room to support each other and have grown-up time. Meetings usually have speakers on various topics. ("How to Stretch Your Grocery Budget" and "Practical Compassion" were just two topics at our group last year.)

Oh--and my daughter hated tummy time, too. Putting a mirror under her face or elevating her on the changing table or crib so I could be below her helped a little. Mostly, we used a Boppy or pillow so she was at an angle instead of flat on her tummy. She also seemed to complain about it less when she was barefoot. I guess she couldn't get a grip on her blanket with her feet covered. She didn't really take to it until she learned to roll over and could control her position herself.

Best Wishes!

I didn't read the other replies, so I hope this isn't redundant, but I did and still do play with my baby a lot with fabric. Laundry time is the most fun, and takes over an hour to fold. Dangle fabric on hands, feet and face. Peek a boo with baby blankets, and flapping fabrics to make a wind effect are also big favorites in my house. Long skirts, towels and wash clothes are also great.

If he is really bored and I can't think of anything else, I get the hairdryer out. He loves the hair dryer on warm blowing in his hair.

Hi, Lucy--

Oh, I soo remember those days! Just when you master it with a great solution, your child shifts and needs something else entirely. Please know that all of this will pass. However, I saw that you are really into animals. I am not sure where you live, but we have a zoo pass here and used to go to the zoo frequently. I am into animals and now my daughter is also. Just walking around in the fresh air and talking about the animals relaxed me and I found that, what relaxed me, was good for my daughter, too. I hope you get some peaceful afternoons soon.

Best of luck to you and yours!

I'm kinda on the 'natural' side of things, I didn't bother with tummy-time too much until the kids could roll themselves over and choose their side.

Therefore, hangy-toys were my go-to 'mommy needs a break' toys ... for better or for worse (I would never now want this toy, but back then ... ) we were given a playskool? kick;n;play piano/lightup toy that the baby could lay underneath and kick or hit the dangly things and make it play music ... it almost survived three babies ;). It was mostly with the first I used it, though, when there was noone except me to keep an eye on her/keep her eyes busy ...

I agree that just getting on with your life while carrying the baby is likely to teach them about living in a more healthy way than structured activities 'designed for babies' ... but I also think that that much mommy-time at this age can only set your child up to be extremely emotionally secure (although as soon as they exhibit independence you should make sure to let them have it so no artificial over-dependence occurs) ...

anyhow, that was all mixed messages, but dangly-toys are a definite recommendation. My mom used to tie metal measuring cups from the handle of the pulled-out silverware drawer for me to hit at when I was that age

You have had a lot of good advice. I'm going to reitterate some.

Wear her and do things that you like to do. I also found it important to get out and about at least once a day for my own sanity. As you do things while she is being worn, talk to her and tell her what you see and what you are doing. It's kind of like talking to yourself, but you can get away with it since you have a little one.

My daughter and I tagged along with my husband to Paris and I used a wrap and we went on walking tours throughout the city. We got up, ate breakfast, then went out and was out all day until just before dinner. She seemed to be happy, I had a blast, and I got away with lots of faux-paus, I'm sure. I tried the language and culture things, but didn't experience any negative issues in Paris.

So, get out and have fun and make sure you get adult time with friends. You might also check the hospital where you delivered, they often have new mom's groups available and if not at your hospital, check others, they might charge a small fee for like 6 months- Providence St. Vincents in Portland area charges $35 for 6 months if you didn't deliver there, otherwise, it's free.

Good luck to you,
D.

I don't really have a ton of advice but my son was born March 16 and we're running into the same issue. He doesn't like to sleep much so that compounds our problem. We've found fairly simple games keep him pretty entertained and the play gym mat we have seems to REALLY keep him occupied. He will stay on that mat batting at his toys long enough for me to at least start dinner. It's been a lifesaver for me. Good luck.

Ummm.... do you leave the house much? Especially while the weather is so nice, go to the park. You can go for a walk and talk about what you see or even just bring a blanket and let her see what the other kids are doing. She doesn't really need any more entertainment than you. Take her grocery shopping and talk to her about EVERYTHING you see. You'll feel silly, but it's really good for her development. Really, do anything that is of interest to you and talk to her about it. Go to the local library story times. I know that I was getting bored at home with my daughter when she was that age. She was content, but I was bored. Since you're into animals, take her to zoo or preferably the petting zoo if possible. Touching the animals is great for her sensory development!

At home, listen to music and dance with and for her. Do finger games like "where is thumbkin?" and "itsy bitsy spider". You're already doing books, but it's not possible to read too many books. If you're not already a member of a mom's group, there are a bunch. Check meetup.com to find one you like or sign up for a MOMS or MOPS group through a local church. Lots of groups are free, and some charge a little bit of dues, but are completely worth it!

You sound like a wonderful mother! I think the best thing you can do for your child is talk to her. Whenever you are doing anything just tell her what you are doing. She will love to watch your face, listen to your voice and try to figure out what it all means. I agree with the other moms. You don't want to train her that you are the entertainment source. You want to show her the world but let her learn to explore and learn to play on her own to. The older she gets the more valuable this skill will be. Good luck, you're little girl is so lucky to have a Mom who loves her so much!

Great commitment ( re TV free ) --- what about in the pm - setting up a ''''schedule'' where you put baby in her bouncy seat in front of a mirror - so when she kicks and wriggles and makes the chair bounce - she sees the reflection of her movement- and how about music?? -- classical music develops a part of the brain that will really help her as she grows- but if you prefer Country or anything that comes to a harmonic place--- great ( if youplay non-harmonious music like some of the metal bands ands grunge type- it is agitating- it was meant to be - and that's NOT what you want- you want her to enjoy it - lolol)

My grandaughter - now 4 years - LOVED her '''Johnny jump up ''' and would spend HOURS in it - very happily - watching me cook or clean --

Blessings,
J. - aka - Old Mom

It's not unusual for babies to be restless/crabby in the afternoon. I planned my shopping for those times. I found going to the store was very interesting for babies. Also, maybe you could plan some getting together with friends during those times. Also, it's fun to get them introduced to "helping" you. Like, bake cookies and have them hold a spoon and measuring cup while they watch you. If you talk all the time, they'll like that.