How Much Milk Does a 14 Month Old Need? Please Help- Huge Debate in My Home!

Updated on December 13, 2008
L.W. asks from Suncook, NH
19 answers

We have been trying to get my son to kick the bottle habit. He does not use a pacifier or anything else to soothe himself so we have been letting him have a bottle with water in it. We switched to water because of all the talk of bottle rot and tooth decay. My problem is this; he used to drink a gallon a week and now he will hardly drink milk at all. When he got it in the bottle he would also drink it from a Nubby cup and he drank a lot of water as well from a cup. Now all he seems to want is juice? He hardly ever wanted juice before, he used to love milk/water. He is a great eater and I have been giving him extra cheese and yogurt to try to compensate but this can't be enough can it? Do I go back to giving him the milk with his bottle at nap/bedtime to give him the milk (and possibly rot his teeth-does it really rot teeth?) or not worry about the milk intake? I feel as though I am in a losing situation here. I say give him the milk, my husband says no way- his teeth will fall out. But weren't we get given bottles when we were young and we still have our teeth? HELP!
Thanks so much for your thoughts. We need them :)

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So What Happened?

Your responses were great! We have not given up the battle of the bottle. He still only gets water in his bottle at nap time. We do only use certain cups for certain things.(ie yellow is water, blue is milk and pink juice) He still does not have any great love for milk and only drinks a little with his meals. I have decided to stop focusing on the oz intake and instead just make sure he gets his calcium and vitamins through his food. He is a great little eater so it has not been a problem. It was very helpful to find out from you exactly how much he needs, now I read the nutrition info on yogurt, cheese etc. Now everyone is happy! (we just won't tell my husband he was right!!!)

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S.B.

answers from Boston on

Hi L.,
my daughter is the same age and her pediatrician said between 15-20 ounces of milk a day.
Hope this helps : )
S.

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C.B.

answers from Boston on

Hi L.,

From personal experience only ... once my boys made the switch from bottle to sippy at 1 yr old, neither of them would drink milk. My oldest absolutely refused to drink milk - EVER! As he got a bit older he had milk with his cereal & I'd sneak it into anything i could. He eventually started to drink milk at about 3 or 3 1/2 yrs old after I (for like the 20th time) made him try strawberry milk, chocolate milk, coffee milk, plain milk. He finally made that transition. My youngest is 4 & still won't drink milk. He only gets it through his cereal. I've talked to their pediatrician about this multiple times in the past & I'm not worried anymore. Our pedi told us that as long as the boys get yogurts, ice cream, cream cheese, sour cream, milk in cereal, even milk w/the added syrups PLUS they drink orange juice with calcium in it --- that they're JUST FINE. He said it's really not something to be worried about at all. There's other ways to get Vitamin D & calcium, you just have to do your research!

Otherwise, don't sweat it. For sure, talk to your child's pedi & see what he/she has to say. Our pedi is pretty well known & I think he's fantastic - I really couldn't be happier with him.

As far as the bottle goes - we literally threw all the bottles away on each kid at 1 yr old (12 months) - trust me, they learn how to use a sippy really quick! =0) There's so many different kinds too so youjust have to find the one that works best for your child.

Also - the whole tooth rot/decay thing - what they mean is that after drinking the bottle at night & letting the milk/formula sit on your teeth it's like not brushing your teeth at night after eating/drinking. Another thing is it can make your child end up with buck teeth (happened to my sister-in-laws kid!!!) even though they're baby teeth & will 'fall out later anyway' it can have an effect on your child's teeth later on in life. Nothing to freak out over though. Up til a yr old my kids had their bottles in bed as well. Their teeth are just fine!

Good luck - hope i helped atleast a small amount.
God bless, C. B.

1 mom found this helpful
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D.H.

answers from Lewiston on

Just something to add to your already good posts: I suggest that you stop giving juice and only water. When my daughter knows her only choice is water or milk, she generally picks milk 80% of the time. She has become a great milk drinker! To ween him off juice, add more water and more water to the juice until it is practically all water. My doctor said there is no benefit to giving juice to young children because even the 'no sugar added' kinds is mostly water and can have other preservatives, sweeteners and colors. It's more expensive, too! We keep juice for special treats and parties.

Also, if you're worried about the tooth decay, have you started brushing with your child? We started the finger brushing (a rubber cup that goes on your finger that you rub on his gums) and now our daughter (almost 2) is brushing her own teeth before bedtime with her daddy. She enjoys it. She also gets a little water to drink after brushing in a special Dora cup. It is a routine that she reminds us of every night!

Hope these help! D.

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L.M.

answers from Boston on

Hi L.. My pediatrician said 16-24 ounces. My LO often drinks 24! I wish I could get her off the bottle, she is only 12.5 mos, so I have some time, BUT she is SUCH a fussy eater, I give her 3 bottles a day because I am running out of choices. she hates everything! And I mean everything! So consider this a blessing in disguise for you.
I should do a post for a picky eater. :)

Good luck!

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H.R.

answers from Hartford on

I don't think you should go back to the bottle. Be glad that you've made that transition. It will be even harder if you try again when he's older.

I think straw cups are fabulous, but straw use might be tricky at 14 months...try it. I also like the ones that don't have a stop valve (they would leak if he tipped it over)from the First Years. The milk comes out easily without sucking like a bottle or one with stop valve. My kids both used those and drank mostly in their seats or on a lap (like right before nap). I haven't had any huge issues with spills, but I also don't let them walk around all day with it.

I'm not sure what would happen if you tried to stop the juice. Would he go back to milk or water? Try it. If he asks for juice, say no more juice...it's all gone...would you like milk? or water? Or don't even talk about it and just give him milk or water instead of juice. My kids don't drink juice regularly and I don't buy it except for guests. On occasion they'll have it out or home, but I just don't buy it. Our pediatrician said she'd rather have them eat a piece of fruit...but drink milk and water. Just a thought...

Good luck.

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R.K.

answers from Springfield on

I would dilute the juice. My oldest is going to be 7 and he still drinks the motts for tots. He used to drink a gallon of milk every 2 days but thats all he drank. Your son should be having a cup of milk with every meal and a serving of cheese or yogurt in there sometime during the day to make sure he is getting required dairy. I would stick to just water at night. Milk has lactose and lactose is a sugar and what does sugar do when its left on your teeth all night? You can also discuss your concerns with your ped.

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H.F.

answers from Barnstable on

I would say do not worry about milk intake. None of my four are big milk drinkers - they think it is pretty gross (as do I, I have to say) as long as they have some form of calcium, from cheese or yogurt, or vitamins, or greens - whatever - we drink water almost exclusively with no bad effects at all - my babes are all healthy as can be, from age 1.5 to 8. Cheese and yogurt are plenty enough - talk to your pediatrician(s) - I have talked to mine, and they are all happy with the health of my children.

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R.T.

answers from Boston on

16-24 oz of milk a day is appropriate for a 14 mo. Making up some of that with cheese or yogurt is also fine.

It's not the bottle that's bad, but the milk or juice. As long as you are cleaning/brushing his teeth AFTER his last milk bottle, before he goes to bed, it's fine.

However, you'll have to get him off the bottle completely sometime. I recommend quitting the juice altogether, at least for a while. Once you get him drinking milk from a cup, you can always bring it back.

Have you tried different cups? My daughter liked the Nuby at first, but then ended up preferring the hard spout kinds.

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A.L.

answers from Providence on

Hi L.

My daughter has done the same thing. Once she switched to a sippie cup from her bottle, she stopped wanting any milk. Fortunately, she LOVES cheese and yogurt so we do supplement there to get the calcium she needs. Gerbers or Beechnut makes a yogurt drink that has all the good stuff they get from milk. Those are a great sub. What also worked for us so that we are getting some milk in was switching to chocolate milk. She gets a fullsize sippy cup filled with chocolate milk each morning with breakfast. She takes much better to the chocolate milk. I use the reduced sugar quik brand. Perhaps if you flavor the milk, your little one will take to that and still get some milk intake.
Best of luck.
A.

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M.F.

answers from New London on

Hi L.,

You've already received so many good posts, so what can I add? :o) Well, my daughter will be 14 months in a week, and I do still give her a bottle 3 times a day, 6 oz each. My ped said about 16 oz a day is what she needs (she sometimes doesn't finish a bottle, and that's ok). I've been having her use a sippy cup, but she hasn't gotten a handle on dipping it yet. She's just been a little later at grasping things, than my 2 older daughters (I was able to go straight to sippy cup at 12 months with my older 2) so I thought it ok to continue on the bottle for another week or 2.

Regarding your use of milk in a bottle due to rot-teeth. As other moms have already said, do not go back to milk in the bottle, becuase it will make it tougher for you to get him off of it when you want to. What I do is keep a schedule on her nap, and sleep times, and give her milk 15 to 30 minutes before (which I'll continue when she is strictly on sippy cup). I then go to her bed and remove the bottle while she's still awake. This way, it doesn't lay there in her mouth when she goes to sleep, and there also aren't any dry-milk remnants on her face, since I can clean her up, play with her for about 10 to 15 min, and then off to bed. This is the same technique I used with my older 2, and their teeth are just fine. In fact, they enjoy brushing their teeth, and their dentist has nothing bad to say about them.

One thing you can do, which is what I did with my older 2 that worked like a charm, is have a/some sippy cups meant only for milk, and another/others meant only for juice and water. They knew when they were getting milk, and when they were getting water or juice. This was also an indicator of nap time coming if they were getting milk. :o)

Now that their older, they only have milk in the morning, juice in the afternoon, and water the rest of the the day, and in between meals. They have great teeth, and they go to sleep without any problems, no sugar highs-or anything like that. All three of my girls take vitamins too (Poly-Vi-Sol for the baby, and Gummy Bears for the older girls). If I happen to feel like I may not have given them enough iron, or protein, or milk throughout the day, I know that their vitamins will help get me closer to their daily necessity.

I hope you and your husband find some equal ground.

Good Luck!

Mari

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B.M.

answers from Boston on

my son has seen a nutritionist because of his multiple food allergies and she said he needs 600mg of calcium a day. If one of the yogurts your son is eating is 20% calcium then that is 200mg right there. My son has never had milk because of allergies. He was breastfed until 16 mos and then drank some rice milk and elecare for a few months and just stopped. He prefers water and juice now. I use supplementation because he cannot have dairy. Try calculating the calcium that your son is eating..it may be enough without the milk...consult your sons pedi though!

~There are other sources of calcium out there not just dairy. i.e. green veggies, tofu, non-dairy yogurts, supplementation... Consult your pedi if you are concerned.

http://www.babyzone.com/askanexpert/toddler-calcium-intake

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H.W.

answers from Boston on

I asked our ped the same question because my kids seemed less interested in milk starting around that age (they're 2 1/2 now). The doctor told us that the main benefit of milk is the calcium, which is more concentrated in cheese and yogurt and not too worry if their milk intake lessened, but to find other ways to get dairy into their diet (sounds like you're doing that already).

I wouldn't worry about it too much. That said, if I ever let my kids have anything in bed it's always only water because I do have concerns about the tooth rot issue.

Eventually, I stopped worrying about my babes' milk intake and now they ask for it whenever they want it and almost always drink the full cups that I give them and then ask for more.

Good luck!
You'll

D.B.

answers from Boston on

Kids don't really need milk at all - they need protein and calcium, and there are many other sources for that. You're already doing that - cheese, yogurt, and so on. You can also make French toast with a good soy milk (I like Silk Enhanced with omega 3s) and added protein powder plus eggs for the batter. Use a good whole grain bread if you can, especially one with "holes" in it to absorb the batter. Same deal with pancakes - make a super batter using soy milk and added protein powder, throw in some frozen blueberries, and make a batch. I freeze pancakes & French toast with a piece of wax paper between each one, then pop out what I need and heat them. My son has devoured these for years - and he's now 19!

I wouldn't go back to the bottle if you're successfully transitioning off it. Also, the juice is not helpful for the teeth either, and too much of it fills the child up so he's not hungry for more. Definitely dilute the apple juice with half water. Of course he loves it - it's all sugar!

I also have friends who use a fantastic kids supplement called "Now for Kids" from Reliv. Mix it with water to make a vanilla shake (it also comes in chocolate), add it to yogurt or even applesauce, mix it with a little water and eat it like frosting on a spoon, and so on. Replaces all that milk and it adds all the vitamins kids need in a highly absorbable form. Totally safe, 20 years of success from a highly regarded company, no warning labels (even Flintstones vitamins have a warning), and something that's being used worldwide (thru the company's charitable foundation) to feed kids who only get that for a meal! It supports the immune system so a) you don't have to worry so much about what else your child eats, and b) you will probably find a huge reduction in colds, flus and so on. Let me know if you want more info. You can talk to other moms who used it successfully!!

Good luck!

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L.L.

answers from Portland on

As much as he wants and YES from his bottle if he wants it.
I have seven children, the baby is now 31. They have beautiful teeth, and none had ANY bottle related teeth problems. Neither did any of the other young mothers in my day.

I cannot understand the young mothers today wanting to take away binkies, pacifiers, breast , and bottles when a small baby is barely a year old.
TWO YEARS OLD is the weaning year and has been for twenty thousand years.

Sucking is so much more than what is in the bottle to a year old baby. It is their comfort, it is their security, it is their self esteem, and their strength and their source. Especially if breast fed or held.
It is something that should stay the same until they are ready to relinquish the need for it which generally happens at two.

I never forced , or had the "the baby is crying itself to sleep" issues that so many of you seem to have. If the baby cried in the middle of the night we took him/her to bed. By the time the child was two or three he/she was in their own little bed and sleeping all night.

Let the child have its sucky, no matter from the breast or bottle or binkie.
I did NOT send any of my seven to school with a binkie or bottle.
THey are ALL FINE.

Best wishes and God bless
Grandmother Lowell

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K.D.

answers from Barnstable on

My girls always drank a ton of milk and never had rotten teeth. You could brush his teeth with a baby tooth brush after he has the bottle to be sure.

My sister in law's daughter did lose her 4 top front teeth from milk tooth rot, so it does happen. But she gave her the bottle at bedtime/naptime and let her have it all night.

Juice has lots of sugar in it and is not necessarily great for teeth either. You can mix the juice with water to dilute it.

My advice would be to not let him drink it while lying in his crib and to keep his teeth brushed.

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A.R.

answers from Springfield on

Sounds just like my now 22 month son. He had his last bottle at 15 months and by then he was only on a before bed bottle. If you'e kicked the bottle I wouldn't go back if I were you. My son definitely prefers juice so I cut it half with water and only buy 100% real juice. He always gets milk at meals. Sometimes he drinks it sometimes he doesn't but that's all he is offered. After dinner he can have milk or water. Since 15 months he has gone through phases of drinking none of one thing and a lot of the other since we introduced drinks besides milk and he seems to be fine. I think it will all level out whereas going back to the bottle might make it harder to take away the next time. In the beginning of the switch when he never wanted milk I used to make him yogurt smoothies which he loved. He also is a huge cheese/yogurt kid. You might not be ready for this yet at 14 months but I also will give him chocolate milk sometimes (a tiny squirt) because I found it to be less sugar than juice, he loves it and then he is getting his milk consumption in. Long story short I think he'll go through phases with different preferences and I wouldn't worry too much about it unless your doctor is concerned.

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P.B.

answers from Hartford on

My pediatrician said no more than 16 ounces of whole milk a day. With that being said, my 17 month old comes NO WHERE near that amount. I need to take me own advice here and limit the juice so milk and water are his only options. Sometimes I put a splash of yogurt smoothie (another trick from my pediatrician) in with the milk so he will actually drink it. I, too, supplement with american cheese (ask them to slice it thick at the deli), yo baby yogurt and Gogurts (frozen). As far as nap/bedtime bottles go, I would suggest to steer clear of that one. Not only is it bad for his little pearls, but it's a habit that is going to be harder to break the longer he does it (and you already stopped!) Good luck!

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L.S.

answers from New London on

As long as he doesn't have a bottle in his mouth all day he won't get rotten teeth, especially if you brush them. That is just silly. Plus juice is just as sugary. My son still drinks 4 bottles of milk a day. He is 18 months old. He was drinking 2nd step toddler formula until I read about the melanin in enfamil. Milk is good for babies, but if you are giving cheese, yogurt, etc. Then you should be fine too.

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A.B.

answers from Providence on

Hi L.,
My son has never been a big fan of milk either. He's 3 now and has been off the bottle since 13 mos. I definitely recommend you do not put your son back on the bottle because, like some of the other Moms said, it'll be a much harder habit to break down the line. My son now is only offered milk with his meals and sometimes drinks it (and sometimes doesn't). I find that if I give him the milk in a "big boy cup" with a straw he is more likely to drink it. He does like apple juice and orange juice but I limit his intake on those per day. Like you, I supplement with cheese and lots of yogurt and other dairy products. My son's pediatrician has assured me that he he is doing just fine and that this is a typical phase among little ones. So hang in there!

Happy Holidays!

A. B.

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