How to Curb Anxiety over Plane Travel...

Updated on July 08, 2008
H.P. asks from Denton, TX
9 answers

I am flying in 2 days, first time since before 9/11. I am having a lot of anxiety and irrational fears. This is a family trip, and my 2 daughters will be flying for the first time-- I don't want to freak them out. Worst part is when I am nervous, I don't sleep and my stomach gets very upset. Any encouraging words or advice about how to calm down and such (without medication) is welcomed. Thanks.

I just wanted to add that I have flown before with no problem. I am always paranoid that i'll get sick b/c I get motion sickness, but it wasn't a problem then. I think it was just something about seeing those planes fall out of the sky that has affected me more than I thought. Thanks for your advice!

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So What Happened?

Thanks for everything, guys. I was a nervous wreck on the flight... I still hate flying! I can't get over the feeling that we could just fall out of the sky at any given moment. That being said, we had a wonderful trip! SoCal and Disney are magical places, and our family has picture perfect memories that will last a lifetime.

More Answers

T.F.

answers from Dallas on

I know how you feel. My anxiety began after emergency landing #1. It took me a while to get the nerve to board another plane but I was NOT going to let this fear control me and miss out on Hawaii!!! Then, last year, we had emergency landing #2 which was more critical. I knew I could not stay in Vegas where we were stranded and I HAD to get on another plane.

My common sense tells me that I am safer on a plane than in a car. I fear the unknown parts of flying. I have no control. Takeoff is my worst. Once we hit the 10,000 ft and the "safe ding" comes on, I am ok.

One thing I still do is make eye contact with the pilots and staff. They want to assure your safety!!! My husband travels weekly on planes. He helps me through take off. I just breathe easily and have faith it will be ok. My daughter had to get her nerve up to get back on a plane as well and last year, she flew home alone which was a major step. I count seats with my hand to know how many seats to move to the exit if needed. I do make myself aware of the exits and all the "rules".

We prefer to sit in the front part of the plane. We only fly non-stop, only fly on jets (no turbo props), and usually get into first class if available. A glass of wine helps!

When weird noises occur, I look over at the businessmen who I know are on planes a lot. I can tell by their calmness that all is ok.

This is a fear that I refuse to control me and keep me from travel. I tell myself that and as soon as the safe ding comes on, I settle back with a book.

You will be occupied caring for your girls so your nervousness might not even show up because you are focused on them. Make sure you have some gum or lollipops for them on the descend or the "Airplanes" earplugs to help ears. My daughter always had a tough time coming down with ears popping. I used the safety card as a reading lesson for my daughter.

I hope something I said helps. You will be ok. Enjoy!!

tf

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C.H.

answers from Dallas on

I wish I could give you some good advice...I fly often and don't usually have any anxiety. There have been a few moments of panic and the way I get through them is to close my eyes and pray (calmly!). I breathe deeply and slowly. Usually that helps. Since you'll have your kids with you, hopefully you can distract yourself pretty easily...maybe play a card game or ask what kind of birthday party they'd like...pick a subject that will get them talking. That way, they won't hear your voice shaking and you can try and really focus on what they're saying. Ask clarifying questions and get them to keep going. Bring a notepad to doodle on if that will help to keep your hands busy so you're not gripping the armrests. I hope it goes okay for you - good luck!!!!

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L.C.

answers from Dallas on

When I fly with my two kids 9 and 6, I actually feel more comfortable because my fear was "who would take care of my kids if something happened to me" and when were all together I feel better. To help ease my tension a few days before I really have to controll my thoughts and change the subject in my mind. I try and stay focused on the things we will have fun doing. On the plane I try and keep us occupied, I pick up a kids magazine with toys in it for my daughter to look at my son has his I pod with his favorite songs that load the night before and he is not allowed to listen to it until we get on the plane. Make sure the kids have some gum. I also give them pictures to color to give to the pilot and flight attendants. They get really focused on showing off their best work. Good Luck take a deep breath and give your anxiety to God!

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C.P.

answers from Dallas on

Hello H P

Here are a couple of suggestions: Go to sprouts and get some chamomille tea and start drinking it (of course, assuming that you're not allergic to ragweeds) if so, then valerian tea or capsules will help too. get some lavender oil. put some lavender oil on a tissue and put it next to your bed. you can take the small bottle with you in the plane. put a drop on each wrist. if you feel anxiety coming, smell your wrist. see if a vitamin B-complex will help your "nerves" Good luck and you'll be fine! ~C.~

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J.S.

answers from Dallas on

I do not have this particular anxiety, but I do deal with irrational fears sometimes. There are two things I would recommend...

1. Progressive Relaxation (you can google it to find out more) and yoga breathing (this is where you inhale deeply through the nose and let it out through the nose)

2. Look into some practices from the Feeling Good workbook by David Burns. He has some great ways to help you face your anxieties and help overcome them.

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B.P.

answers from Dallas on

Purchase noise-cancelling headphones from Bose-you can get them at Target. Hook-up watch a movie or listen to your ipod. We have four boys and purchased an inexpensive portable DVD player at Wal-Mart ($65). Both your daughters can watch a movie to keep them occupied as well.

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D.J.

answers from Amarillo on

I have the same problem. I will tell you it is somewhat easier when your kids are around, because it forces you to remain calm. When I used to fly with just my husband, I would refuse to talk to him and just look out the window for the whole trip. Can't do that with a four year old. Things I have done to help minimize my anxiety: I always take two Immoduim before flying (I know you don't want drugs but this really keeps my stomach from getting upset), I also try to fly Southwest whenever possible because they have the best safety record and have never crashed, and I avoid turboprops at all cost! Overall I am able to control my anxiety. I also tell myself that the trip will be worth it. Good luck, you will be fine.

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A.J.

answers from Dallas on

I know this sounds stupid but you can ask your DR for some zanex if its real bad or just have a stiff drink...

I am one to talk, I have not been on a plane in years after a bad experience on a prop plane. but when I do get back on one I will be doing all of the above!

Have fun!
A. J

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B.W.

answers from Dallas on

It is different flying now. Make sure you are prepared for the new TSA rules and the rules of you airline. Get to the airport at least two hours early and make sure you check on the gate. You are safer on that plane than in your car going to the airport. Prayer is something I have always done before take off and taught my daughter to do as well. You are right to be concerned about conveying your anxieties to your young daughters as they look to you as a role model. I think we were all a bit nervous the first time after 9/11 but to give into it is to let the terrorists win......we can never do that.......have a wonderful time with your daughters.....are you going somewhere fun? I flew to NYC last year with my teen daughter for her to tape a Montel show - it was her first time in the city and we had a blast! Enjoy!

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