my 11 month old was sick this past week, and when i tried to nurse him he would push me away or he would even chomp down. OUCH! I've noticed him slowly loosing interest which is great and Im so proud of him to self ween, but our morning and evening routines are not like they were. Now there is no way to calm him down, or make him get "ready" for bed. He drinks from the sippy cup all day, but when it comes to getting him ready for bed he pushes that away too. so he never settles.
I guess need help or advice with a bedtime routine.
p.s he naps great.
Thanks
It's great that he's using a sippy for his milk/formula all day and it would be great to skip the bottle step completely, but at bedtime, they often need something comforting and he is still a baby - a sippy isn't really comforting like the breast was. I know you probably don't want to start with a bottle now but he may find that soothing at bedtime.
Wonderful that you breastfed nearly the year!
Don't let others' comments get you down - if you're pleased and proud, if your baby is healthy and happy, then don't worry.
You say he naps great? What's the routine there? Maybe apply that to the bedtime routine? Although I wasn't nursing, I did have to do a major switch in the bedtime routine at 12 months because we discontinued the use of the bottle. Our son was a great napper, too, so I would treat the bedtime routine like the nap routine - look for cues of tiredness or drowsiness (or if it was 6:30 PM - his bedtime), know that meant it was time to go to sleep, then take him upstairs and turn on his 'sleep' cd and put him down. It took maybe two days but he adjusted and was fine. You may even need to start the process earlier even while he is awake - start to lower the lights and get a little quieter, read books with him in your lap, more snuggling, cuddling - anything to slow him down.
Both of my kids weaned themselves between 10-11 months old. I'm not sure if something changed with my milk at about that age or what, but they BOTH did it and it was almost exactly around the same time. Anyway, the bottom line is that you will have to start a new routine and this will take some time. Do you still have a rocking chair or glider in the room? If so, what I did was to give a sippy with milk (or formula before a year) and let them hold it so they could drink it if they wanted. We would sit in the rocker and I would read stories and sing some songs until it was clear they were finished with the milk. Sometimes they drank it, sometimes not, but I didn't push the issue. Then, I would turn off the light and rock for a few minutes and cuddle before putting them down in the bed. You may have to find what works for you and your baby, but just try to start a new routine that makes sense for your family and keep doing it for a week or so to see if it catches on. It's an adjustment period, but you'll get there!
Could he be teething? If you are fine with the weaning, don't worry, if not, you can keep trying to offer.
For bedtime routine, we would change the diaper, and put on jammies, then one of us sits in the rocker with the baby and the other reads a story. We give cuddles, then into bed. It is a simple routine, but consistent, and we can do it anywhere. It has worked for us with our first, and now second.
My son weaned himself at about 12.5 months, so just a little older, but we kept the same routine, just instead of nursing I was only holding him, and reading or singing to him. I don't know what it is you do to get ready for bed, I know one suggested a warm bath, which I know works for most kids, however, I had to stop bathing my kids before bedtime, because they both become more alert after a bath. I'm the same way though. I didn't figure that out for quite some time, but the rule now is if there isn't at least an hour and a half before bedtime, they get baths in the morning. (they are almost 7 and 3.5 years old now ;) Good luck!
My daughter self-weened at 9/10 months. It happens... You did AWESOME to nurse as long as you did! (I told the lactation consultant at the hospital after our 2nd was born that I was only able to nurse my first for 9/10 months. She surprised me and said 'Fantastic!';v the average is only 4 months. You nursed your son until he would transition to whole milk and solid foods. Good job mama!)
I found that having an infant /toddler is all about adjusting and re-adjusting your routines to the child's various phases and developmental milestones. Once you get used to a particular routine, its bound to be obsolete... When my daughter no longer nursed, our routine was bathtime, teeth brushing, reading (touchy feel, texture books or baby/vocabulary/letter books, then I'd rock her and she'd have a bottle while i sang lullabies until she feel asleep. I really suggest you commit to introducing the brushing teeth aspect now because trying to introduce it in 6 months (15-18 months) sets you up for battles. He will still fight you on it but stick with it no matter how discouraged and frustrated you get because it will eventually result in a 3-4 yo who voluntarily brushes teeth and a 3-4 yo who refuses.
I personally wouldn't be proud or pleased with this at all! As you can see, he still needs to nurse. Drinking all day is no substitute for nursing. Teething is another reason this could be happening. I would continue to offer him the breast and see if he will one day take it. But if that's not possible, read The No Cry Sleep Solution for a variety of ideas on getting baby to sleep and establishing a new, soothing routine.
A warm bath with nighttime bath wash and lotion that has lavender in it works wonders. Then, pjs, a short story and rocking for a little bit. This helps my dd. Hope this helps you and your son. Good luck!
