Pregnant with 2Nd Child - Nervous :)

My best tip is to relax and don't sweat the small stuff and JUST BE YOU. It will come to you as it happens.

I had 2 on my hip at the same time and wondered how in the world I would ever go to the grocery or Wal Mart, but you know what, it just happens and it just works out. So relax, just be you!

It will be harder in the beginning, but so much better as they get older!

Keep the oldest involved as much as possible.
Have baby items such as diapers, wipes, blankets, toys & passies where you can ask the older child to retrieve them to help you. Especially at 18 months! That age LOVES to feel useful & helpful.

Have him show baby books, have him show baby how a toy works etc...

Anything to keep him involved. Also, try as best you can to carve out special time - even if just 20 minutes - where it is just you & the older child. Let the phone ring, let the door go unanswered so ho knows he is more important than all that grown-up stuff.

You will be fine! We will be here if you need us!

Remember, whatever is the most challenging thing you face, it will not always be... it will change. You will never have to do any really hard thing forever.

P : )

L.,
My two are 18 months and one day apart. The youngest is now 4 months today! I was so nervous too. Landyn (22 months yesterday) seemed like such a baby, and I remind myself that even though he looks huge compared to the baby, he still kinda is. The other amazing thing is how much they change between 9 and 18 months when the new one gets here. At first I couldn't imagine it, but now we are starting to get into a routine, and that has made all the difference for us. The best thing is seeing them together. They love each other so much, both of them. She'll just lock her eyes on him and smile and smile. And he wakes up in the morning looking for her. It's a challenge, but like the first one, instincts kick in and it all begins to fall into place. Good luck!

My girls at 2 years 5 months apart. A little more of a span then you'll have.

When my oldest was born preemie I start an in home day care and by the time my daughter was 11 months old I had another 10 month old baby and a 6 month old. I never thought I could do it! However I put them all on a schedule. It does take effort and patience, but had all 3 babies napping at the same afternoon schedule, so I could catch a break and my breath. If you think that a schedule would work for you, look into some books on how to schedule a babies and give it a try.

The schedule worked for me because I could get my grocery shopping done without babies crying to be feed, I scheduled doctors appointments around nap times, not during, I was able to get some chores done without interruptions during nap time. Heck some days I even read a book during that time.

My other advise is to let your son help. He'll be walking by then. Let him go fetch the diaper bag for you, let him throw stuff away for you, he'll even be able to hold a bottle for the baby with your help. Include him in as much as possible so he doesn't feel left out, but needed.

Good Luck!
K.

I have 4 kids myself ages 12,10,7 and 5. The best bet when they are close i age is to take turns on the feeding, bath them together if you can etc. My youngest 2 are so close they have to sleep by each other at nite because they want to

L.,

My advice to you is to get ready for a messy house, chaos, madness, and lots of sleepless nights. But the bright side is that it is worth every bit of it. The joy that comes from seeing any child grow and develop into their own little personailities can't even begin to compare to the changes your going to experience. It will be hectic the first few months the new baby is around. I'd advise you to start a routine with your little one now that will help you and him adjust to the new baby. You may think, "I'm only 8 weeks" but time flies and before you know it, the baby is here. Another word of advice is to spend as much time with your first one so when those feelings of guilt begin to invade your thoughts you can be confident in knowing that you love both of them no matter how much time the new baby is taking. As far as hubby goes, I have a hubby who is hardly ever at home because of his responsibilities at work. Get in your mind now that you're going to have to learn to manage two without him and that way you won't be frustrated when he's gone and resentful when he's there. It will take time but you will adjust to the second baby and then you'll think back and wonder what you were so nervous about in the first place.

My children are not that close together but I went through the house to really make sure the house was child safe. I also had certain rooms that we used, family room/dining room, which I rearranged to make it more friendly for our family. I had things toys and activities that my older one could get to and do safely. The other thing that really helped was my cousins daughter who was around 12 at the time came over to help me. She was the oldest in her family and was very good with the children. She would come and help me and it made a big difference. When she was a baby I was her mothers helper. Do you have someone in your family or possibly a church friend,neighbor that could help you for a while when your husband is gone. I used to give my cousin $5-10 a day for helping me. It was not much but I appreciated it and she thought it was great. Good Luck!

L. -- Congratulations! What a wonderful time...the birth of your second baby! It's going to be okay. The other moms have posted some great advice. The only thing I can offer is this. My FIRST baby was the hardest. While going from 1 to 2 babies was difficult, that baby was a lot more laid back. The 3rd was even easier. The 4th was super easy! :) What I am saying is that the mothering skills you've been using will carry you through this. Do stick to routine with bedtimes. Don't feel guilty if you play Baby Einstein while you make dinner. Put the baby in his/her crib when you need to shower and don't stress if he cries a little bit. Take advantage of it when your husband is home, and make sure that you get time off to spend with friends...or to exercise...or to go see a movie. If you have balance, you'll make it through. Take care of yourself. Have fun with the babies!

My 2 youngest are 18 mths apart. I have a now 5 yr old girl and a 4 yr old boy. I also have 2 14 yr old girls...not twins. My husband and I brought 1 girl each to our marriage. Just remember this one thing...Not everybody will be happy all the time. Sometimes you have to let 1 child or both cry a little. My daughter was on the bottle till she was 2. (hardest child I have ever had to break from the bottle) I would be in the process of feeding my son and she would start crying for milk or even a sippy of juice with crackers. It never failed she always was requesting someting. After about 3 wks of her just totally throwing a fit every time I fed him she finally learned to wait with some patients when I said I will get it in a few minutes. Sometimes I would be in the middle of changing my daughter and I would hear my boy waking from a nap. Instead of rushing and tossing her aside, I just finished changing her and held her and hugged her for a few like normal with some added kisses and then let her down to play. I always done that from the beginning to let her know that I love her. After they start walking they never want held but to go to sleep or when they are hurt. After the first few weeks my son learned to yes cry a little to let me know "hey Im up", but he would not have himself in a frenzy looking for someone. Crying never hurt any child. When my son was 1 and my daughter 2 I had to be in the hospital for a week. I had gotten bitten by a spider and ended up with MRSA from it. My husband asked me "How in the world do you get anything done?" "Someone is always crying to be held or needing something." I just smiled and said "Sometimes you have to let one of them cry."

You are rightfully nervous but don't worry it will workout honestly. My girls are 17 months apart and I got very nervous before my second daughter was born and they love each other to death. Adjusting to a second child takes time but you can work them onto the same nap schedule and so forth. It will be frustrating at times once the second one is older and the copy-cat stage hits but it can be cute also. Remember to let your oldest help and to make him feel included in the care for the baby.
Best of luck.

I don't have any advice because I'm in the same boat with you! My babies will be 17 months apart. We are super excited too, but at the same time nervous. I'm lucky because my husband works a half day Mondays and usually home by 6:00 most nights. At the same time we have 2 dogs, which can make me crazy with just one baby right now. It's overwhelming just thinking about it. Anyway, just wanted to let you know that you aren't alone. I'm going read your replies to find help for me too! Don't worry...we'll be fine! Good luck and congratulations!
-K.

I have a couple of book recommendations, although they would be for after the new baby came along.

1. Toilet Training in Less Than a Day - it works! Save yourself from having two in diapers. The child needs to be at least about 20 months old. It's well worth the effort of a day (your hubby could even do it). Then you'd only have one in diapers.

2. Making the Terrible Twos Terrific (John Rosemond). He teaches how to have a nice child, instead of a brat, and the "terrible twos" begin somewhere between 18-24 months. I can't recommend it enough! That would be a big help for keeping your sanity.

With both books, the sooner you implement those "tools", the easier it will all be. Also, take half a dozen fish oil pills a day to replenish the essential fatty acids that your babies are leeching from your brain/body, and according to my naturopathic physician, doing so will help prevent post partum depression. Costco and Sams have big bottles (400) for $9-12. Consumer Reports did a study, and didn't find any more heavy metal contamination between the cheap brands and the prohibitively expensive ones, so they recommend going with the cheapest. Best wishes, and enjoy those babies!

Hi there! Congrats on your new addition ;) I know exactly how you feel...my boys are 13 months apart! Is there a friend/family member or neighbor who could come and help you when your husband is at work? Maybe a middle school/high schooler who could be a "mommy's helper" in the afternoon. You may also check with some homeschooling groups to see if there is a teenager who could help you out during the day. Before our second son was born, we bought a play yard and "taught" my son to play in it. At first, he was not too keen on the idea of being in there and would scream to get out but after a while, he learned to occupy himself. We would rotate toys every other day so he had "new" ones to play with. That worked SO well because I could put him in there while I was feeding/changing the baby and know that he couldn't get into anything especially since he was already walking at the time. Hope that helps - our boys are 3 and 2 now!

I recommend getting as much help as you can, especially those days when your huband is away --- 2 kids under 2 can be very overwhelming, b/c you have to constantly watch the older child to keep them safe, and tend to the baby too (mine are 23 mos. apart, my baby is 3 mos. and I still feel like I need help, but it's getting easier). Hire a sitter if you can when/if family help is gone. Good luck! It'll be great fun once they are a little older and can play together : )

L.-

You will be fine! My girls are 18 months apart. When the baby came, my older daughter was very very helpful and never howed any signs of jealousy. We put her "in charge" of a lot like getting diapers, washcloths, and picking out pjs or onesies for the baby, etc. They even shared a room and still do and we have not had issues with sleep. Try to nap when they nap. For a long time my girls were not on the same napping schedule so I would put the older one down for a nap and then lay on the couch with the baby to nurse her and at least then I got some "down time." On the days when your husband isn't going to be around to help, just take it a little easier - unless the kids are filthy, skip bath and just spot clean them. Eat leftovers so you don't have to try to make dinner with a kid on the hip and another wanting attention. Try to plan ahead so you won't be forced to run errands in case someone has a meltdown and you just can't get out of the house when you need to. If you can swing it in your budget, consider getting a young neighbor to be a "mommy helper" for an hour or two a week, for $5 an hour, you will still be home but she can play with the kids while you do laundry or whatever. When our older one got to be around 2 she no longer wanted to be in a stroller and that became quite a challenge if we tried to go anywhere, so we invested in a sit-n-stand stroller (only $110 at Baby Depot) and that was a lifesaver. Best investment ever. I found that going from 1 to 2 kids was really a piece of cake until the younger one started to crawl and get into the older one's stuff. So I had a good 7 or 8 months to transition before it got to be harder, but it was still manageable. Good luck and congrats!

Hi L.:
Congratulations! Every baby is a blessing. I know what you are feeling because I currently have a 17 month old and a 10 week old. I was unsure of how I would handle the sleepless nights + having a toddler who is more and more demanding. It has actually gone smoother than I thought. With #2 I am so much more relaxed and calm. There are times that I have to put the new baby down (who is crying) in order to discipline the older one. My best friend encouraged me to realize that the older child will be frustrated at first with the new baby's demands of your time, and that is when they will act out the worst when the new baby first comes home. Then they learn that this new little critter isn't going anywhere and they adapt. That has been completely true for me. I am sure that juggling all the tasks as they get older (moving to solid foods + potty-training, etc.) will be a learning experience, but each stage has that and I have found when I am really challenged in "how do I do that?" I tend to rise to the occasion and surprise myself.

Tips that have helped me are: working on getting the new baby sleeping through the night. At 10 weeks she slept 10 hours straight last night :). Also, bouncy seats/swings are great for when you just can't hold them. And remember to take the time to get down on the floor with your older one to play, even if just for a few minutes. Those are the moments they will feel loved and that you are still there for them. In addition, save grocery trips for when your husband is home and you can go alone or only take one child, or go together with him. Something else I do is when I/the kids have appointments, I schedule only one thing per day, and make sure that it coinsides with their nap routine. THat way if they are worn out (or you are :)), you can go home and recoup, and a grumpy baby makes for a grumpy mommy too. And finally, throughout the day, try to stay organized and clean up as you go. That way you aren't cleaning up the kitchen at 11:30 at night, by yourself since your hubby may be working.

You will do fine. THere will still be days when you say to yourself "what have I gotten myself into?" but they will be outweighed by the joy being able to care for your kids yourself and see them growing!

Blessings!

My two children are 19 months apart, and it was rough going for those first several months. I don't want to get you down -- there were a lot of good times, but there were still very many times when my older son was still very much a baby and needed babying, while my younger son who was even more of a baby needed even more babying, and they were both crying at the same time, and I felt like I couldn't do it any more. These times will pass! Sometimes you might just hold both your children while they're crying and you're crying too, and that will be okay.

Take advantage of your husband's help whenever he is home. After the baby is born, rest when you can, and hope that your two kids will sleep at the same time sometimes so you can get a complete break and/or a nap yourself. Get a babysitter sometimes so you can go out, or just get stuff done around the house, or just so she can take care of one or both children while you take care of the other or take a nap or whatever.

Start learning now the skills that will help get you through those first few months -- including making double or triple batches of a recipe and freezing the rest in meal-sized portions for quick dinners; learn to use a crockpot (very simple!) so you can make dinner whenever you have a chance in the morning and just let it cook all day; get your son involved in "helping" you do household chores so that you can get stuff done with him, instead of trying to figure out ways to distract him while you get stuff done, and also transition him into being "mommy's helper" when the baby is born; get some sort of baby carrier so you can wear the baby while you work around the house, read to your son, play with him, etc. -- it will keep the baby from being fussy and fractious when you need him/her to cooperate.

Hi L.!

I remember what you are feeling. I have a 4 & 5 yr old that are 13 and a half months apart. I felt nervous if my husband was going to be gone too, but what I found to be true is that the way we are made up, WE JUST DO...when we have to and it all works out. The worries always seemed to be for nothing.
You've already gotten some advice on this, but I, also liked mine to nap at the same time, for some of my own peace. But, find out what works best for you, maybe it's different nap times, so that you only have one at a time to take care of for a bigger portion of the day. (plus it gives you one on one time with that child!)
And lastly, my kids LOVED the Baby Einstein movies. My daughter would sit in her swing and be mesmorized by them for hours! Both of them could be crying and as soon as they heard the song, BAM, fine! MAGIC!!!
I wish you the best of luck! If you can get past the infant stage, it is a lot of fun. They will always have a built in friend.

Hello, I understand your concern. My two youngest ones are 24 mts apart and at first it is horrible until I got on a routine as to which child was changed and which cup goes to which kid(this of course when the new one is a little older) but when you get a routine it is nothing. the two youngest of mine are 3 and 1 and they play together all the time. they will be best friends and worst enemies all in the same day. My oldest was really rough with the baby at first, so watch that. he always wanted to lay beside him and kiss him or even carry him. which he actually carried the baby to me at about two weeks old..I was scared to but everything was fine and the baby didn't get hurt. As for you husband not being home alot it gets very frustrating, or it does for me. mine worked out of town for a week at a time when my first was born so I just got use to doing everything by my self and when my baby came along I was use to it. It does take some time getting use to doing things with two or three in my case, but with a good routine it come in shape and works it's way out. Not to say you won't be ready to cry along with them sometimes but a few hours a night with quiet time is a GOD sent...good luck to you and I wish you all the best. D. in Hurricane, WV

Well, thousands are doing it, so my suggestion is to relax, and stop worrying, it will come as it needs to. you will become very organized, when you are by yourself. It means having a schedule, and doing for 2 what you do for one. The 18 mo old will still need diapers and feeding, naps, lots of cuddling. Wear the baby in a front carrier from the time they come home, thus keeping you hand free. Do chores when hubby is off and not do any when he is gone. You can email me anytime you have questions, and I will help you tackle anything. I raised 3 of my own and a neice. The kids were 7, 31/2, 18 mo and 13 mo. The neice and my sil moved out when neice was about 4. I am a gma now and babysit a lot when I am off from my full time job.
Take care of yourself now, your body and your mind, but don't dwell on what you can't change or do right now.

with the first ine you sleep when he sleep with the socond one you have to have your first on aschdule and let him help with like getting the dippers and the wipes make him important to and also on you husband day s off you will need to give the first one take to the park for hour so he dotn feel push out

My two oldest are 23 months apart. A little more than yours will be. My best advice is to just relax, breathe and take it easy. Don't make any big plans. I didn't have any problems with 2 -- I thought it was easier! I had my 2nd child on a Friday and on Monday I told my husband to go to work because I could handle it and I did. I actually took them to the doctor for his 3 day check up! I loved it! My daughter was the older and she was the biggest help! She would get things for me. Just make sure before this baby is born that you put things where the oldest can get to them and really child proof your home. I am the type of parent that will let my kids play in their own home and am not worried about what they get into because I child proofed it very well. No worries! Above all, just relax and have fun! They are only babies once! Congratulations!

You will be the best mommy. You already are. Letting the older one help will is a great idea. Also when the little one is sleeping have a story/alone time with the toddler. I have 4 and the more you have the more they have to fit into your schedule. My baby has spent many a nap at the soccer field or the pool or where ever the older kids have lessons. You will make it work. Enjoy them.
The one thing I did was have a strict bedtime routine. My 3 littlest were in bed by 7:30. We had dinner, bath story bed. My hubby is a Marine so he is either here but on a work up for deployment or on a deployment. You'll make it work.

Just from my babysitting experience with having two little ones months apart, I would say just be ready to breath. :) Sometimes they will both be crying and you just can't get to them both. That is okay. They will be fine. Remind yourself you are doing the absolute best job you can. Also, I would add that getting them on similar schedules is great. Obviously the baby will be sleeping more than the other. But, if you can time two of the older's naps during the babies it will give you some actual quiet time during your day... perhaps even twice during your day. :) Good luck, Lord bless you! They will be so happy to have each other for now and forever. My 16 month old looks so lonely when she plays. When I do babysit, she tries to hold the baby and hug him. It is so cute! So that age apart will just melt your heart, even if your patience are gone.
Amanda

Congratulations on being pregnant again! Now, RELAX....yes, as you said, lots of women have raised two plus small kids and they all have managed. I have two small children, who are not quite 15 months apart. But my daughter who at the time was 14 3/4 mo old was way ahead of her time when my son was born. She was walking at 9 month, talking in two and three word sentences when our son was born, listened beautifully and really enjoyed having a little brother. That being said, every sibling is different, but that is a different story I'll get to later. First of all, you....

You can do this, especially if you love kids and you wanted to have them so close together. In my case I did not want to have mine so close, but what can you say, their little blessings! I believe that having them close is a good thing, you go through the same stages close together so you don't forget what it is like when the other one catches up. Not to mention labor, it was so nice to have such a clear memory of what my first labor was like to help me deal and try to achieve a better delivery the 2nd time, but that's another story.

Bringing home your new boy or girl, do prepare your little one for their arrival. I'm sure as you get bigger, and since he's older than my daughter was he might be curious to know why mommy's belly is getting bigger and bigger. You can take him to sibling classes and talk to him about having a younger brother or sister, and do try to make him feel important when your little one gets here. Their are lots of books out there about introducing baby, but that's enough about that, I'm sure you'll prepare him as you all get ready.

Next...as far as bringing the baby home, yes it is tiring and yes it is a bit like a jungle gym at some points, but if you're lucky and blessed to have a second easy baby then things should be good. You know, rest when the babies are napping, eventually do try to get them on the same nap schedule and even the same bed time routine. It'll take some time, but it can be done. Your new baby will probably sleep a lot in the beginning (you hope!) and this way you can play and interact a bit more with your son. If you want, and if you can, look into registering your older son in a mommy morning out program. Either at his preschool to be or even the local Y around here offers Mommy's morning out, they offer 5 days a week, my daughters preschool is only 2 mornings a week. But that was a joy to have that break from her while I focused on my son.

I breast fed both of my little ones, which was wonderful, so we had lots of family snuggle time on the couch with some help from Curious George and Sesame Street/Elmo to help pass the time while I was nursing my son. This way she was contained and I was able to relax and nurse.

You can do this, you just have to figure out what works for you and your situation. Do call on family and friends in the beginning until things settle down. If you haven't already look into play groups now, so when the new one gets here you can still help your son and take them all out on a big group play date. This way you can interact with other mommies and get a little break from entertaining the little one(s) all day.

Going out to stores with two little ones can also be a challenge, but it CAN be done! You just have to figure out what works. In the beginning while your little one is little put them in a baby sling of some sort. That was our life saver at the grocery store. My daughter was in the cart, and my son was attached to me and we would shop just about anywhere! Go out when the weather is warm and it worked for us to go out in the morning hours when everyone was a bit more happier than in the afternoon. Hopefully by the time your little one gets here your son will have dropped his morning nap, but do try to get them both on the same nap schedule so you can have a break too during the day. This took some time but by 4/5 months we were all sleeping at the time, but not always in the same intervals. But it eventually gets better. My son is a way better napper now at 18 months the my daughter ever was!

ALSO....you've done this before, you've raised a beautiful little boy so far and have had success, so you can do this again. And this time you know what you're doing (sort of!) Every child is different and what didn't work for your son, or those things you wished you knew with him you can now use with your new child! We succeeded so much better with our night time sleeping routine with our son then our daughter, only b/c I knew what to do and how to do it and it worked so much faster. (not to mention, I think he is an easier baby than his sister ever was!) You can read their cues better and you have an idea what their cries mean. So RELAX, it's normal to have jitters about being a mom of two and to have them so young, but it'll all work out in the end.

Good Luck with your pregnancy and best wishes to your new edition to be to your family!
A. B

lol, don't be nervous, you will adapt! I have 7, all about 2 yrs apart. One of my daughters has twins, and a son has 5 so far. Children are a precious gift. It may be hard, but so worth it. You can do it and will do a great job, I'm sure! Remember, God never gices you more than you can handle!

We have 4 children and my two older boys are close in age. They fought when they were young, but they became very close in high school. They are best friends now.

My one suggestion that was the most helpful was that I would get a stack of children's books and read to my older child every time I nursed the baby. We made it a special mommy kids time. As a result I never had to deal with jealous siblings issues when the new baby arrived.

You will do fine. If you feel post pardom or stressed, get help. don't be afraid to ask for help, take help, etc Try your hardest to keep the kids on a schedule, kids thrive on a schedule. In the begining you are going to be very tired, nap when the kids nap...even if you are behind on house things. Get your oldest into a bedtime routine before the new baby comes, you will want your time at night for down time and quiet time. When your husband is home, cook dinners ahead and freeze or eat leftovers when he is at work. Less work on you when he is not home. If you can afford it, hire someone to clean for you for the first few months or so, so you won't feel overwhelmed. Your new baby will sleep a lot at first so make sure to spend all the time you can with your oldest baby. Once I had my daughter, I had this guilty feeling that I was taking time away from my son, who was 2 1/2 at the time of her birth. It was probably just me being emotional but the truth is, you are giving him/her a sibling and that is the best gift you can give. Don't stress, it is amazing!

Routine, routine, routine... ask Daddy to help stick to a routine as well. My little guy pretty much put me on his routine, and it works for both of us. I hope you have some family or friends that can help you when you get tired or crazy. Good luck!

My husband is a police officer so I understand the long shifts and feeling like a single parent a lot. I have three girls between the ages of 6 and 5 months and I also keep my 2 year old nephew Monday thru Friday. The best advive I can give is when things seem to get rough just take a deep breath and remember that ten years down the road you are going to wish you had this time back. Just take one thing at a time.

Hi L.,

My children are 2-1/2 years apart and my husband is military, so I've been a single parent for very long stretches at a time. One - don't stress. That will only make it worse. It will be an adjustment, just because there are more of them than there are of you. Go with the flow. Don't sweat the small stuff. I always made sure that I had at least one weeks worth of clothes for everyone, so if I didn't get to laundry that day, it didn't matter. Enjoy the time you're kids are small, it will pass quickly. They will not remember if the house was spotless or if their clothes were "perfect", but there will be lifetime benefits of spending quality time with their parents. There are benefits to schedules, but with their daddy's work schedule, theirs will just be a little different. It sounds as if your husband is more than willing to spend time taking care of his children - that's rare and you should be thankful. Use those times to "re-charge" and do something nice for yourself. Then, you'll be ready when he'd gone to give the kids your full attention. The kids may still be eating baby food, but look into some good quality frozen food for you and your husband or cook in large batches and freeze for later, so you won't have to worry about cooking everyday. Relax, you will be fine. It's obvious that both you and your husband play an active part in your children's lives. Don't compare yourselves to anyone else. Find what works for you and enjoy it. Godo luck! L.

It will be a great help if you get your first into some sort of a routine now. Then keep him on it as much as you can when the new baby comes. He'll find comfort in his schedule. Also, make him a part of this baby. Even though he will still be a little guy, there are lots of things he can do to help you. He can bring you diapers and wipes for the baby. When you nurse the baby, he can sit next to you and listen to a story. Make this his baby as much as yours! And the most important thing, since they should both still be napping, rest when they rest. It will be tempting to clean when they rest, and get things done, but take my advice (I have three little boys and run a daycare in my home), they are only little for a while, and the housework will always be there after you rest!!

Mine are 2 yrs and 8 days apart.

I heartily suggest a sling or baby carrier of some type. If you're wearing the baby, you still have hands free to take care of the toddler. My favs are at www.slinglings.com but there are a ton of kinds out there.

Also, hang out on www.babybunching.com A world of info from women in your exact situation.