Scary Potty?

WOW, bringing back memories of my little girl who is now 10 yrs old. She was very afraid of the potty. She hated the flush for years and it was a challenge to get her to go potty on a real potty. I could not train her on a big potty. I had to get the portable ones for her. We let her decorate the portable potty with stickers each time she went. It was a show-case when we were done. IT was great. But for years I had to flush for her and it was not until about 6 years old when she started to flush her self.
However, I did not start my kids til 3 yrs old. Which was late for many peoples opinions...but it worked for us. I think you are doing a great job and if she is already telling you she needs to go, then that is a great start. Maybe the portable potty will be more HERs and she can decorate it and it will change her perspective and stop the screaming. good luck.

I think maybe she's not mature enough yet even though she does tell you. That's great. I would start off by having her sit on a potty chair after a bath maybe when she has no clothes on yet. Just for 'fun'. Let her have time to get used to it and tell her some day soon she will be sitting on it all the time. Make it positive. When the time is right and you are ready to really begin, don't stop and start with the training but go forward and either do a reward with small treat, small gift, or whatever you want. We used stickers, charts, marshmallows, buying a toy when it was 'done' for good, etc. Each child was different with the reward. When you are ready make sure you are in charge and not the child. If you ask them most all of them will chose not to go sit on the potty in the beginning. It's work for them. I got a potty for our grandson that I babysat and trained when I had him that was a Fisher Price musical potty that he loved. He was NEVER going to sit on a potty and yet he loved that and it plays music when you go. I can still hear it....but it was fun for him. You could check into something like that and tell her she could make the music and how you like it, etc.
If she is just 2 though, I would wait a bit myself and when it's the right time it goes so easily usually.

2 years old is a bit early to worry about this. It sounds like you're doing the right things. My daughter, now 30 years old, was potty trained on #1 shortly after age 2, but she would refuse to poop on her potty chair. By the time she was approaching 3, I'd had it. She would hide behind chairs and poop in her diaper, refusing to sit on the potty chair. I reached the point where I was no longer concerned about her psyche, caught her heading for her favorite BM spot, and took her to the bathroom--under protest, of course. I made her sit on the potty chair, telling her everything would be fine. (She was crying all the while.) She held it as long as she could, but as it happened, she smiled and said, "That didn't hurt, Mommy!" Where do they get these ideas, anyway? After that she was completely potty-trained. Good Luck!

How about letting her sit on her potty chair when she's NOT about to relieve herself? The competing sensation of needing to go might be too much for her to deal with. If you let her work it through without rushing her, she should get there.

Have her help her bare-bottomed dolls and teddy bears use the potty seat, and then admire the results and help them wipe. Keep it light; no pressure. With my grandboy, this make believe helps him convince his toys not to be afraid of various medical procedures, therefore calming much of his own fear.

Just tell her, when she does tell you she needs to go, "Thank you for telling me! When you get big enough, you can use the potty instead of your diaper. You can tell us when you're ready to try that, OK?"

I truly believe part of the problem is that you've let her sit on the potty...still fully-clothed/diapered. This needs to be as real as possible for the kiddies to get the idea! & if she's going in there while you're using the bathroom yourself.....then you have the perfect opportunity to set the stage for proper usage of the bathroom & not "playtime".

That said, I do firmly believe that potty training should not be a game, should not be pretend. There's lots of good books/videos out there to make it real & fun for the kids...without turning it into another creative play outlet. If the process is simply matter-of-fact & you remain in charge, it goes quicker & easier. BUT the key is to do this when your child is fully self-aware & able to tell you she needs to go!

Don't have an advice for you, but I wanted to let you know that I am having the same issue with my 28 month old. She wasn't afraid before, but now she is. She'll poop, then lay down and say, "change my diaper mamma!" She tells me when she's pooping, etc., but will NOT sit on the potty! I will be watching this to see what great advice you get.

Sorry, no advice, but support for my camp! My little guy is scared of the potty too. He is 28 months and he is ready in all other aspects, but he is terrified of the potty.

I will mention though, be VERY careful. My son started holding his urine and BM in until he was in his bed. This meant he was only going twice a day. He would say that his tummy hurt, but refused to go in his diaper or the potty. Only time let that one heal.

Good luck!

Dear Hilary,

As a preschool teacher and a mom of two, i promise you she will not go to kindergarten in diapers. (unless she is much more delayed than what you said). In my experience, lots of parents start potty training their children becasue they are tired of changing diapers, or (in my case) they are young and listened to someone else's view of if their child should still be in diapers. There is no harm in letting her where diapers for a while longer, especially if she is acting afraid to go. i would recommend just backing off, even taking the potty chair out of sight for a while. If she is able to express when she is going (clearly with out a translator), able to undo her own clothes quick enough, and seems to be willing to go, then i would try again. but wait at least 2-3 months for her fear to abate. when you reintroduce it, make it very nonchalant, and if she expressed any fear, try it again a little while later. remember, if it turns into a battle, this is one you cant win. She has to decided to be willing to do it.
And by all means, feel free to research it. If your gut tells you she is ready, but is being defiant just to be defiant, then give her a choice: does she want to sit on the big potty or the little one; does she want to sit before or after her bath; at the normal time for her to poop, use a timer and does she wan to sit on the potty for 2 min or 3 mins?

good luck!
Liz C

No don't rush her. When sitting her on the potty, give her a book she likes. When and if she uses the potty, be sure to really compliment her.
Also go to www.google.com put in it (how to potty train a 2 year old )and it helps parents. I hope this helps.