When Do Think Another Baby Is Right?

My vote would be to start now! I had my two kids three years apart and this seems to be ideal. I wanted to have them even closer together, but I just couldn't get pregnant until then. For me, the whole point of having more than one child was so they can play together as they get older and distract each other so that I can get a little bit of my life back. And when I am done with the "baby years" I want to be completely done forever. Babies are cute and a joy and everything, but let's face it - they're a lot of work. I also want to start getting my body back in a shape I can keep it in. I can't imagine why people would want to spread out the pain over many years. At three my son is able to feed himself, use the potty, understand things I am telling him, and tell me what is on his mind - all things that make it easier for me to juggle a baby in the other hand, yet he's still young enough that he will never remember being an only child. I think a three-year spread is perfect.

Having them farther apart is better for you, but I say having them close together is better for them, short- and long-term. Yes, you have 3 or four years of constant work, (which is not My speed, I only have "one and done", but others have higher energy levels and attention spans!). But when the diapers, for instance, are done, they're DONE!

I understand you wanting to enjoy each kid as they come along, but what happens when you're gone and they only have each other? They need to have a better chance at being friends, and big gaps in age might undermine that. They might become friends once they're adults, maybe not.

Just my opinion!

-S

Mine are 3 1/2 years apart and I am very pleased. They are close enough in age to play together but far enough apart that he was done being a baby and wanted to help out. Realise that you can never have the time like you spent with the first because there are two now.

Basically, the time is right when you are ready. I've known people who have had their children one right after another, and it was wonderful for them. I had my first two 2 and a half years apart, but the next one came 5 years later, and the one after that, 6 years later. Same dad. LOL. I really liked it farther apart because I was able to spend good quality time with each. My oldest has had hers pretty close together, and wouldn't have it any other way. God bless her, her 5th (yes, 5th) is due in January.

Boy do you sound just like I did after my first child! LOL My husband and I wanted more children but weren't sure when to 'try' again. Well, since the first one only took 5 mths of trying we decided when he was 1yr old to try for number 2. We thought 2yrs apart was a good number. HA HA HA LOL!!!! Little did we know at that time that it really isn't up to us at all.

We did everything we knew to do and still no baby. For 4yrs still no baby. We were gonna start fertility drugs when guess what....I was prego! Our second son was born, almost to the day, 5yrs after our first. It certainly wasn't our plan but it was the BEST plan!

And guess what happened 5yrs after that?....YUP, I was prego again! Our third son was born almost exactly 5yrs later. And what a wonderful blessing he has been to our family!

It just goes to show that no matter what, God is always in control.

And as far as work goes, there is work that you can do from home WITH your children. In fact, I do so every day with my own. What a deal, huh?!

Enjoy the journey that life takes you on. You deserve a great life!

Take Care,
N. :) SAHM homeschooling 3 boys 13, 8 & 2 yrs old and married to my Mr. Wonderful for 15yrs on Thurs. I love to help other moms, who want to become SAHMs, reach that goal!

If you are questioning it then it sounds like now is the time. If you wait till the child is 4 you have single child syndrom. Having them closer together menas that they will have more in common and you can train them to do many things at the same time. If you plan on going out on a limb and having more than two, the older children help the younger children in training...train the older children right and you have good up and coming teachers to help out.
Mom of 8

I don't think there is one perfect "right" time to have a baby. Some of mine are only 20 months apart and they are very close to one another and have similar interests. some are 3 and 4yr apart and they also enjoy playing with their younger and older siblings. The older ones remember their sib being born when they are younger they can't remember a time without their sib. If you want more children my advice would be to have them. No matter how close or far apart they are you will have plenty of love and joy.

You have many things to consider: Can you afford to have another child right now? Do you want your first child to have a play mate? If so closer in age is better. Do you want one child potty trained before doing another in diapers? Is any event going on with your and your husband that would make now bad timing? Is everyone in good health? My children were 3 years apart and we thought that was perfect for us. AF

I agree with the other posts that if you're thinking about it, it probably is time. My children are 2 and 4. They are 27 months apart. My sister and I are 22 months apart. I've seen kids that are 12 years apart that are the best of friends and others are not even close. I've also seen it with kids that are as close as 9 months apart and they are the best of friends and others are not. It all depends on how the kids are raised as to how close they will be when they grow up. It has nothing to do with age. Hope this helps and God Bless.

depends on if you want them close in age or not. if you dont care then i'd wait til he was in school or at least 3 so he doesnt need you so much. mine turned 5 the month before i had my second and iloved the age difference as far as my oldest being able to help or being able to get her own drink and going potty on her own so that i'm not needed as often while nursing or changing diapers. if you want them close in age what are you waiting for get crackin. good luck!

J.,
Honestly if you want another little one I would start trying now. I have 5 and my oldest 2 are 4yrs apart which I personally think is to much and my other ones are between 17 months and 23 months apart, the closer ones where tough but the 2 that are 23 months apart are great. Growing up I had 2 brothers, ne older and one younger and there is 4 yrs between each of us and growing up we did not get along at all, now we are fine. Personally I think a 2 1/2 or 3 yr age gap is perfect.

Why do you need to give up your nanny job? I have 3 at home full time and I provide care for a other children, one part time and one full time and I have done this since my 3 1/3 yr old was an infant.

What worked for me was having them 26 months apart. It was tough at first, but now they're 5 and 7 - they are the best of friends! Also, going on outings now is EASY b/c they like the same stuff. Last weekend we went to a movie and then to a pizza place. It might have been harder if they were further apart in age and wanted different movies. I a thoroughly enjoying them (and life) now! Good luck :)